#YKT

Ten years of friendship. A decade.

Wow.

I don’t exactly remember how we all got along.

I don’t really remember the past.

I remember we were so innocent, so naïve, so afraid of making a mistake.

That was the world we lived in years ago.

We were guilty of nothing.

We were so brave, so brave.

So ready to conquer the world.

So many things have changed. So. Many. Things.

Interests, no matter how farfetched and how weird, are still, well, interesting enough to talk about.

Conversations were like strings of a puzzle.

Everyone talked about everything.

Secrets meant to be hidden are shared, secrets meant to be shared are kept hidden.

Gossip

Movies

People

News

Music

Work licenses

School

Families

Love

Everything

From one pizza slice until the next gummy bear vodka shot, our lives intertwined on a world of our own. Time has changed things, that’s for sure. But we always, always come back to where we left off. I always wondered if I met a different group, went to a different school, lived in a different place, what would my life be right now? But then, I come back crawling to a resounding answer, “I don’t know.”

I’ll never know. But as long as I’m with these freaks, I know I’m still sane, I think.

One decade worth of friendship.

Cheers.

And on we go the next.

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Retrospect

I visited my alma mater today. My niece has swimming lessons there. And while she was learning the basics, I went to revisit our good ol’ building. It was weird, why was I nervous to enter an empty building? I felt giddy and nostalgic, mixed with a tinge of regret. Of course I loved my high school life. It was amazing how the years went by, and I really thought my HS life went by a blur, and I don’t know if it’s a good thing or not.

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I walked down the hallway and entered each classroom. Dust and the old smell of notebooks made me sneeze a little bit. It’s as if I wasn’t alone in that room though, I imagined myself feeling frustrated because my classmates weren’t listening to my announcements (I was one of the officers then), or I was laughing so hard I was crying because my friends were nestled closely telling a joke, no, demonstrating a joke, or sometimes, I was merely sleepy or tired that I shut out the world and ignore my friends’ chattering.

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I had so many crazy times. I remember running around a campus because of a race I bravely joined despite the pouring rain, or the madness when we had our cooking festival, all the raw vegetables were rolling down and we were eyeing if anybody saw it. I remember when I felt so worried if I got permission to join a leadership training outside Cebu, hoping that my parents would permit me. I remember feeling nauseous, anxious and excited when I joined a beauty pageant once, when I have no freaking idea why. I just did. I remember that when my friends and I went to the cafeteria for snacks, we always, always walked so slow. We knew that fact, but still kept walking as if time never went by. I also remember that we had our annual religious procession at school, and we were assisting as officers, it was so dark out. It was fascinating to see the building empty at night. Camping with the girls, ghost stories, love stories, retreats, everything we had to experience at school meant something, maybe we rolled our eyes to the advice our peers or teachers tell us, but its effect will always last. I remember, at graduation day, my closest friends and I huddled together, talking, clueless about the next stage of our lives. I was reminded of the thought of what was once yesterday. Seven years was a long time. One of my fondest memories was where I sat in the rooms. I remembered where I sat up until now. Maybe it had some significance or something, but I know God put me there for a reason. I just know it. As I walked in our hallways, I reached my third year classroom (grade 9), and smiled. For three years I had been classmates with these people, but it was in this specific year that we established to be a group, a team, a family. I don’t know how it happened, it just did.

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It’s been almost four years since we graduated. But the distinct smell of high school remained. It’s as if we never left. Things change, that I’m sure of. But I always knew that when I found true gems in my life, I’m sure I’d never let them go.

4:51pm // SRCDS Grounds

Temporary High

A night I’ll never forget.

You just jump and sing along.

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The university organized an event slash concert last Friday, November 22,2013. It featured local bands and dj’s from Cebu and the proceeds will go to the victims from the typhoon Haiyan (Yolanda). Well, I can’t say I had expectations, this was my first “U-NITE”  (we called it that) so I definitely heard of cool stuff about this event. I wasn’t disappointed. It was kinda boring at first, I mean, it’s still 7pm, people are still piling up and stuff. And then boom. The crowd was crazy. Sweat, small water cannons and other foul odors were present, thank you very much. But we didn’t mind, of course this was the place were everything was just ignored and you just tune in and jump and dance and scream and have fun. And we went home with happy places plastered on our faces. Cheers.

 

Endings

“I believe there’s something beautiful in endings. (am i weird?) It’s that certain rare feeling you get, when the tears have all dried off, when all you can say is “I’m okay” when the truth is, the pain still lingers. Sometimes life slaps us right in the face, punches us and beats us to the ground until we’re left bleeding and dying. That vulnerability that someone exudes seems beautiful to me, we all have days like that, when we just want to break down and shut the whole world in front of us. But, as they always say, after the storm, comes the sunshine. That tiny light that always comes through. It always does. Everything has a purpose, a meaningful cause to everything. We may not know what it is, but it will eventually unfold right in front of our eyes and then it hits you, this experience is a living proof that you are never alone. Never. You may feel lonely at times, and feel like the world is against you, but you are never alone.  I guess that’s one of the most beautiful things I admire when you feel lost. There’s always the light that guides you home. And I’m not saying that there will always be that light. Sometimes you have to search for it. And no one else can find it, no one else. Please believe that you are beautiful, that nothing can stop you from doing great things. Whatever obstacle, trial, complication you will encounter, please believe that you are larger than life, conquering the Earth. Some people will try to bring you down, but there will always be few who will stick with you no matter what. And that the universe will always conspire with what you yearn. Please believe that you are, you can, and you will.”

 

– As I organized my stuff hours ago, I saw a tiny sheet of crumpled paper. And realized this was written a year ago, on September 17, 2012. This was dedicated to SC and I wish her all the best. After everything that had happened, I admire her strength and I believe in her. This is also dedicated to every person who has experienced a challenge in their lives, hoping to rise up again, and remember that in this journey you are never alone.

Tip of the Iceberg

Travelling to a new place is always a good thing. For most of us, that “fear of the unknown” gene does not exist. I mean, what could be more exciting than going to places on your own, without your parents? Even thinking about it then sends shivers to my spine. But as they always say, we get a taste of our medicine somehow. And for me, I did, on 2010 when I went to Manila for a Leadership Training, for a week. Although I was with 12 other people who shared the same intense enthusiasm, travelling without my parents sounds pretty much travelling alone to me. I distinctly remember on that night before our flight, I was having chills. I was nervous and excited and anxious and cold and “Are these planes safe?” Well those kinds of things. I felt everything and nothing at the same time, and I don’t know what that really means. But it was my first time in a plane, and I am a little afraid of heights plus mix in a little turbulence here and there and I was closing my eyes and praying the Hail Mary and try to forget all the movies involving plane crashes. So when we landed, I was metaphorically kissing the ground (who would actually do that?) and went on our way to eat breakfast and do some sight-seeing for the time. Being in a new place is so strange, you get to see and experience an aspect that no one ever has, I mean, Manila is definitely a different atmosphere compared to Cebu and this, my friends, made me realize how lucky I was that I was born and raised, and lived in Cebu. Things aside, Manila was very urban. And by urban, I mean both the good and bad sides of urban communities. Smoke, easy access to malls and hotels, traffic, new sites to see, you name it. There’s just something about visiting new places that makes me so happy. It’s that whiff of air ( in my case, smoke) that you don’t get anywhere, it’s like inhaling history, being a part of something larger is kind of nauseating but I wouldn’t mind. However, I remember being on the airport and waiting for our van when this lady came up to me and asked if she could borrow my phone because hers broke out and she had to text a friend. I remembered all, and I mean all of the bad things I heard and watched on the television that reminded me why I should be so careful of my belongings, but to make the long story short, I told her I didn’t have one. Better safe than sorry, I guess.

Getting a little piece of Manila with me, even for a short time, is memorable. In those chaotic moments between hasting ourselves to get to our rooms and putting our luggage back to the counter for departure, I did not take a moment to think. It felt like a blur, which I regret. I was, literally, in a state of “culture shock”. We didn’t even get to get in to the famous “Star City” where I can go play with snow and stuff which was the worst part of the trip since it was the one thing we were looking forward to visit. But we visited Ocean Park, and my love for the ocean has never stopped since. Even though I don’t know how to swim, admiring things from afar still feels quite amazing, with all the jellyfish and little fishes. In a span of one week, I had visited only the tip of the iceberg, people. Getting a taste of being in Manila was like licking a small part of the ice cream, and I am so hungry for more. So I hope someday I can go back to Manila and take the time to really breathe in ( not literally though ) the amazing and wonderful places that it has to offer. I don’t kid, I will go back someday.

Putting all these things aside, my experience of being culture shocked in Manila was a whiff. And I couldn’t tell if it really happened, although I knew it did because pictures and certificates happened to be there. But the feeling, of having really visited the place, and having the time to really take in and experience the fact that I was on my own, and had the freedom to do pretty much what I wanted at that time, did not occur to me. But I know for a fact, I will go back soon. The only question is when. And how to earn money to go there.

— Because reminiscing the past on a rainy Wednesday evening seems to be the best way to spend the night.

To my surprise

Let me start off by saying I’m sorry that I’ve made a complete ass of myself when I made that last two posts. I completely focused on the bad things, and not the good ones.

Anyway, yesterday was one of the coolest days of my life. I meant to say “awesome” but it’s getting so mainstream, so I used “cool”.  Cool because we went swimming with these freaks early in the morning, not to mention it was a hot day, talk about sunburn. To sum up with all the little and very funny events that happened yesterday, I’d say that was one of coolest days of my life, again. We played cards, learned to play the guitar, swam and had tons of cracking laughter with the guys. Little did I know some of them could have a surprise for me, a short speech, some songs, and a gift. That actually made my night so memorable. I never expected that they would care for someone so opposite their gender yet I find my interests similar to theirs.

Mostly, people would post about how great their day was because of their girlfriends, or girl bestfriends. I say, this time, let’s do it for the boys! The testosterone-filled, head banging, card-playing, guitar-singing, cool boys! When the girls never understood you for being so sensitive, and so clingy, guys give their shoulders and listen to you no matter what.

This post is dedicated to those guys/men who have stood up on their principles no matter what, those who manned-up and did the right thing even if it means standing alone, those who never thought of quitting school because they think they’re not good enough, and most especially those who do good things not because it attracts the ladies, but thinks that it is just the right thing to do.

I thank the Lord God for giving me the greatest guy friends.

You should too.